11 Hidden Signs of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) – what is it, and how to recognize if you or your loved one might be suffering from it?
Quiet BPD causes emotional instability in a person, which leads to impulsive and self-destructive behaviors. It is important to observe the signs of quiet BPD to control the condition and prevent it from getting worse. Most people are familiar with the more visible manifestations of borderline personality disorder, like dramatic emotional outbursts and visible self-destructive behaviors. On the other hand, people with Quiet BPD tend to internalize their emotions. They might appear calm and composed outside while struggling with emotional turmoil.
In this blog, we will discuss 11 hidden signs of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder that will help you notice the less visible aspects of the condition. These signs will also help you understand how a person with Quiet BPD feels, empathize with them, and provide better support.
Hidden Signs of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder
People who suffer from Quiet BPD do not show their emotions. They tend to internalize their emotional struggles and appear calm and composed. Therefore, it is essential for their loved ones to understand these symptoms of Quiet BPD:
Intense Internal Emotional Turmoil
People with Quiet BPD often experience intense emotional pain. But they do not show this pain and always appear calm on the surface. They experience deep feelings of sadness, anger, and emptiness within and do not share it with anybody. This can lead to severe emotional distress.
Self-Criticism and Judgement
They also become very critical of themselves and judge harshly when facing failure. Due to this, people with Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder become self-critical and feel worthless.
People-Pleasing and Fear of Rejection
Feelings of worthlessness, fear of abandonment, and rejection make them people pleasers. They feel that people will leave them if they do not prioritize others’ needs above their own.
Chronic Feelings of Emptiness
A constant sense of emptiness is common among people suffering from Quiet BPD. These individuals may feel hollow or numb, as if something is missing in their lives. Due to this chronic feeling of emptiness, they develop feelings of isolation and disconnection from others.
Difficulty with Emotional Regulation
Even though they don’t show their emotions, individuals with Quiet BPD face difficulty in regulating their emotions. They may experience sudden mood swings, intense anxiety, or periods of deep depression that they manage internally without outwardly expressing their distress.
Avoiding Intimacy
By now, it is clear that people dealing with Quiet BPD develop a fear of rejection and judgment. Due to this, they try to avoid any intimacy as they fear that after knowing their natural personality, people will leave them. They may also withdraw from healthy, close relationships and struggle to develop new connections. They fear that people will hurt them in the end.
On the other hand, you can feel that they are distant and often try to avoid intimacy, but they also crave, but relationships can be emotionally draining for them. They often avoid intimacy, but they also crave intense connections. The irony is due to their insecurities and emotional turmoil. They struggle to maintain healthy boundaries, which can lead to the following situations:
Codependency – Quiet BPD makes an individual overly dependent on their partner, and they lose their sense of self in a relationship.
Idealization and Devaluation – You can notice them rapidly switching between idolizing and devaluing their partner, leading to instability in relationships.
Extreme Loneliness
Whether they have good relationships, they feel profoundly alone and disconnected from their friends or family, developing a sense of emptiness and longing. They often have difficulty forming meaningful connections and feel like outsiders.
What are the Physical symptoms of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder?
Here are some of the common physical symptoms of Quiet BPD:
Chronic Pain
The continuous emotional turmoil that they feel inside often causes extreme pain like headaches, stomach aches, and muscle pain.
Constant Fatigue
Fatigue is another one of the 11 most common signs of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder. People suffering from this disorder may feel tired, even after a good rest or sleep.
Gastrointestinal Issues
Do you know how strong the gut-brain connection is? Due to this, emotional distress creates gastrointestinal problems like irritable bowel syndrome, nausea, and diarrhea.
Skin Conditions
Yes, a person struggling with Quiet BPD may experience several skin conditions, like psoriasis, eczema, and acne, due to emotional distress.
Heart Palpitations
People with Quiet BPD are often anxious, which causes a rapid and irregular heartbeat. It can feel like heart palpitations.
What are the causes of Quiet BPD?
Different conditions can cause quiet BPD. Let’s have a detailed look at the potential causes:
Genetic Factors
A person who has a family history of BPD or other mental disorders is more prone to developing Quiet BPD. Therefore, genetic conditions significantly influence how a person’s brain regulates emotions.
Brain Structure and Function
Several studies show that people with BPD may have different brain structures and functions. The difference is noticed, particularly in areas responsible for regulating emotions and impulses, like the prefrontal cortex and amygdala.
Environmental Factors
Trauma and Abuse –
Our environment plays a vital role in shaping our minds and behavior. Therefore, a person who has a history of childhood trauma or any physical, emotional, or sexual abuse they are more likely to develop quite borderline Personality Disorder. These experiences impact emotional regulation and self-perception.
Unstable Relationships
Unstable and inconsistent caregiving can also lead to Quiet BPD. If there is any parental mental illness, parental substance abuse, or frequent changes in caregivers’ behaviors, it is a matter of concern.
Chronic Stress
Extreme stress and challenging life events at an early age can also develop Quiet BPD.
Psychology Factors
Many psychological factors can trigger or cause Quiet BPD, including:
Personality Traits – Some people have high sensitivity to rejection and face difficulty managing their emotions. They also tend to think negatively of themselves, due to which they can develop the disorder.
Cognitive and Emotional Patterns – People with Quiet BPD may have developed maladaptive cognitive and emotional behavior as a way to cope with stress or trauma they face in early life. These patterns can include self-perception, fear of abandonment, and internalized emotions, which lead to the development of Quiet BPD.
Social and Cultural Factors
Social and cultural factors like social expectations or peer relationships can also cause Quiet BPD:
Societal Expectations – Society’s expectations and cultural norms related to emotional expression can affect how symptoms of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder develop. In some cultures, more pressure is given to suppress and internalize one’s emotions, which is how people learn to internalize their feelings.
Peer Relationships – Experiences like social rejection, bullying, and peer victimization during childhood or adolescence can also play a role in the development of Quiet BPD.
How Can I Help or Support a Person with Quiet BPD?
Firstly, you need to remember that helping a person with any mental disorder requires patience and understanding. Here, we have shared some practical and easy tips that can help you provide support to your loved one suffering from Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder:
Have Knowledge
Learning about the disorder is the first step in helping your loved one cope. You should know about its symptoms and the challenges they face. It will help you empathize with them and recognize the signs they might struggle internally.
Take Professional Help
Therapy – Professional help such as therapy or medication is often recommended to treat Quiet BPD. You can encourage them to seek therapy like Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) that helps develop their skills to manage emotions and cope with stress.
Medication – Sometimes, medication is also prescribed to deal with symptoms such as anxiety, depression, and mood swings. As a caregiver, you can encourage them to follow their treatment plan.
Provide Emotional Support
Be a good listener
After understanding the 11 signs of Quiet Borderline Personality Disorder, you know that a person with Quiet BPD does not show or share their emotions. They suffer internally. This is why you must provide them with emotional support. You can become a good listener and allow them to express their feelings without judgment.
Validate Their Feelings
You need to acknowledge their feelings and make them feel seen. Throughout their lives, they may have felt neglected and misunderstood. Therefore, it is essential to let them know their emotions are valid even if you don’t completely understand them.
Have Healthy Communication
Be Calm and Patient – You must stay calm and patient even during difficult situations or conversations. Remember that patience is vital when it comes to dealing with people suffering from Quiet BPD. They may take time to open up, but you must be patient.
Set Boundaries – Healthy boundaries are important for you and your loved one. Therefore, you should communicate your boundaries with kindness and respect whenever necessary.
Promote Stability and Establish a Routine
Consistent Routine – It is also essential to help them establish a consistent daily routine to provide stability and predictability.
Healthy Lifestyle—A healthy lifestyle is important for a healthy mind. Therefore, please encourage your loved one suffering from Quiet BPD to exercise regularly, eat a balanced diet, and get sufficient sleep to improve their overall mental health.
Take Care of Yourself
Self-Care – Last but not least is self-care. Taking care of yourself is crucial if you are helping someone with Quiet BPD symptoms because it can be emotionally and physically exhausting. Therefore, taking care of your mental and physical health is essential.
Seek Support – You can also join a support group for friends and family members of individuals with Quiet BPD. In this group, they share similar experiences, and you can get practical advice, guidance, and comfort from them.
Final Thoughts
If you are a caregiver, friend, or family of someone who is suffering from quite borderline personality disorder, one thing that you must remember is to be patient. Helping someone with this disorder requires a combination of empathy, support, and professional treatment. You are crucial in providing a stable and understanding presence in their chaotic life. Your thoughtful support and professional help from a healthcare provider will help promote their independence and well-being.
